Her Owner – BDSM Lifestyle Mastery

How to properly treat and train your property

How To Treat Your Slave

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I mon­itor the keywords used to find this web-site and while most of them are pretty com­mon, some phrases stick out. They interest me because they pose a ques­tion that is some­times not eas­ily answered and the topic of this entry is born by such a “phrase search”

Invest­ment

How would you treat your slave? How would you treat the one thing that is one of the rarest com­bin­a­tions of devo­tion and ded­ic­a­tion to come by? How you you treat the rarest com­mod­ity on the planet? How you you treat the 400 year old paint­ing, the 2000 year old vase? You would treat them with utter care and respect.

Your slave is your invest­ment, not only into the rela­tion­ship that you and her are liv­ing, not only in the unspoken rules of the M/s life­style but also in the pool trust neces­sary to allow her to sur­render her­self to you.

You would not delib­er­ately dam­age any of the things I men­tioned above, bit through phys­ical action and I doubt you would do some­thing that is going to pay bad dividends either. Your slave should be as pre­cious to you as any­thing else that you have value for and then about 1000 times more.

Treat­ment

I own a fairly expens­ive moun­tain bike and I expect that bike to oper­ate at peek con­di­tion. I have lit­er­ally kick my bike around, I have fallen, with my bike, down the side of steep hills and I have crashed my bike more than once while rid­ing. That does not mean that I am not tak­ing extraordin­ary care of my bike after the run is over. I clean my bike, I oil my bike, I replace worn parts, I hone, I squeeze and tweak and I ensure that after a rough day on the track my bike sparkles before it goes back on the hook.

Your slave is no dif­fer­ent from that bike when you leave such abstract things as feel­ing and human nature aside. You might be in a pos­i­tion where you can abuse, use and treat your slave viciously. She will func­tion, she will prob­ably do her very best to give you what you demand, but when you have received that gift of depend­ab­il­ity and obed­i­ence it is time for you to return some­thing. Your slave, just like the bike, needs to be pampered, cared for and some­times parts need to be fixed. You can­not expect your slave, just like the bike, to func­tion indef­in­itely when you never invest in her.

The Human Aspect

When the poet roman Juvenal was asked what a human should desire in their life, part of his answered contained

…orandum est ut sit mens sana in cor­pore sano…

which trans­lates as:

It is to be prayed that the mind be sound in a sound body

Your slave’s men­tal health is is determ­ined by how much time you spend under­stand­ing her needs and anti­cip­at­ing her fears. If you treat her con­cerns, her doubts, her fears, her insec­ur­it­ies as galling inter­rup­tions to you big­ger plans, then you will soon end up with a slave unable to serve you.

Without trust, every M/s rela­tion­ship is very close to the abyss of becom­ing and abus­ive rela­tion­ship. Abuse is not only some­thing that can be defined by phys­ical abuse, there are enough ways to abuse a human being by abus­ing their mind. Just to remind you abuse is often defined as:

  • Phys­ical: Hit­ting, push­ing, bit­ing, punch­ing, choking…
  • Emo­tional: curs­ing swear­ing, attacks on self-esteem, blam­ing, cri­ti­ciz­ing your thoughts/feelings…
  • Psy­cho­lo­gical: Threat­en­ing, throw­ing, smash­ing, break­ing things, punch­ing walls, hid­ing things…
  • Sexual: any non-consenting sexual act or behaviour…

Any­thing which can dam­age the trust between you and your slave need to be addressed, that is your invest­ment into her men­tal health, which is just as import­ant as her phys­ical health.

Restraint

I will assume that you are in con­trol of your­self. I have to, because oth­er­wise we would already have a situ­ation which is born out of an abus­ive rela­tion­ship. You need to show restraint in the treat­ment of your slave. If you own a car you would not use it to do the work of a tank. If you own a small house you would not have thir­teen people live in it. You need to ensure that your wishes are tailored to what your slave can return. Through her phys­ical abil­it­ies, just as much as her men­tal ones.

The desires you have need to match the abil­it­ies of your slave and while I feel it is your duty, just as much as it is mine, to stretch and push my slave’s abil­it­ies, it has to be done with utter care. Like bend­ing a piece of wood, when done prop­erly and with care you can bend a piece of wood into some­thing amaz­ing, if you do it with force and show no patience the wood will break and all your invest­ment is gone. Impa­tience is the arch enemy of any good Master.

Con­clu­sion

This is only a short post because the answer to the ques­tion is a short one. Treat your slave like you would treat your most pro­ceed pos­ses­sion. Treat your slave like the one-of-a kind being that she is, treat her as if she was the most import­ant thing in her life and I can guar­an­tee you that you will be able to ask the most atro­cious things for her and all that you will get as an answer is going to be “Yes, my Mas­ter”.

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4 Comments

  1. Thank you so much for tak­ing the time to post this. There is a lot of inform­a­tion avail­able about the life­style. Unfor­tu­nately, that serves as a double-edged sword. More people are call­ing them­selves “mas­ters” and enti­cing vul­ner­able will­ing slaves to do their bid­ding without tak­ing the time and effort to truly be a mas­ter. These idi­ots want to reap the bene­fits but do not want the respons­ib­il­ity of caring and provid­ing for a slave. i hate that most people view the life­style from what is por­trayed in porn. There is so much more..

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  2. I agree with jer­usha. There is a lot of respons­ib­il­ity and work and study to be the best you can be just like a preg­nant mother as a mas­ter you do everything for two and must be
    ready for the task !

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  3. I agree with the both of you which is why… being the new­bee that I am.… I am doing the proper research to get the right trainging and give this life­style the respect it deserves. I know there’s a long road to becom­ing a master/mistress… and I intend to do it respons­ibly.
    So thanks so much for these awe­some tips!
    ;)

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  4. I have to say, I am at awe. I have been look­ing for this art­icle, or any­thing on being a good Mas­ter for that mat­ter, for a long, long time.

    Not one bdsm or fet­ish site had ANYTHING about this cru­cial subject.

    I hope you don’t mind I pos­ted this on my site.

    Not to steal it, because I gave you FULL credit for your own work AS IT SHOULD BE, but to help my patients.

    This art­icle is a work of art. I admire your cour­age to be bold enough and be so MASTERFUL to write this.

    Thank you. Thank you so much.
    DrGraceG

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