I spent the last few days being sick. Not due to some ill­ness that had befallen me, but my choice. My wis­dom teeth had to come out and because I am notori­ously shy when it comes to going to the dent­ist I gathered all my resolve and “had it done”. Being depend­ent on my slave is noth­ing I fear, I am not the ste­reo­typ­ical male with the hard­core belief sys­tem that you only go to the doc­tor when your arm half falls off and that cry­ing from excru­ci­at­ing pain makes you a “pussy”.

My inab­il­ity to be in con­trol over the past couple of days, mostly thanks to the won­der­fully effect­ive oxy­codone I hap­pily swal­lowed every four hours,was not truly a choice of mine. I loath the feel­ing of loos­ing con­trol over myself and the situ­ation I am in or about to put myself in.

I have and had noth­ing to worry about though. As pre­ju­dice as it may sound, I per­son­ally feel that there seems to be a lack of respect on the most basic level for slaves. This is espe­cially some­thing I seem to notice when own­er­ship is already estab­lished and “Mas­ter does as he likes”. I came to ask myself what it is that makes us dom­in­ants think of our slaves more like a chore rather than a pre­cious commodity.

I will no try to lump every­one together, so this is dir­ec­ted at the ones who do not feel that being “nice” or con­sid­er­ate belong in the “job descrip­tion” of being a dom­in­ant.
That we live in an illu­sion of con­trol as dom­in­ants should be some­thing that we can all agree on by now. There are enough art­icles, resources and lengthy essays on the topic strewn all over the digital space. I do not think it is neces­sary to revisit the topic, let us assume for it to be true.

It is my slave’s choice to serve me and to sub­ject her­self to my con­trol and her emo­tional well being plays an import­ant role in that abil­ity. For her to serve well it is in my best interest to keep her in a state where she is not only emo­tion­ally com­plete but where she feels appre­ci­ated. Through the haze and mist of demean­ing beha­viour, abus­ive lan­guage and degrad­ing play with any human being there is always an inner core left which needs nurturing.

My abil­ity to bal­ance min­imum of effort with max­imum impact makes it easy to man­age my slave and her expect­a­tions, not only in me, but also her­self. Stop­ping by the store on my way home to pick up a single flower has insig­ni­fic­ant impact on free time or money, but the ges­ture itself has a max­imum of impact on her. Not only does it reflect that I care about her, it is also a cal­cu­lated ges­ture to rein­force that I appre­ci­ate the emo­tional and phys­ical toll my slave is pay­ing every­day by being who she is.

Being con­sid­er­ate is not about cud­dling and spoil­ing your prop­erty, it also most def­in­itely is not about spend­ing thou­sands of dol­lars on her. The require­ment is one that is much harder to ful­fill and that is what makes it so pre­cious to her, you need to invest time and thought.

There are thou­sands of ways to invest some thought into what your slave does for you on a daily basis and I am not only refer­ring to plain ser­vitude that might be encap­su­lated in her cook­ing, clean­ing, wash­ing, doing the taxes, bak­ing, suck­ing your cock or walk­ing the dog. Your mileage will vary and you know best how your slave is most use­ful to you in the envir­on­ment you have chosen to cre­ate for each other.

You will not cre­ate an imbal­ance in power just because you decide to do the dishes for once or because you decide to cook next Fri­day. Con­sist­ency is import­ant in any Master/slave rela­tion­ship but excep­tions only rein­force the rule. Your prop­erty knows very well that you do not have to do the dishes, that you do not have to cook. She under­stands that you do it as a choice, that you choose to do it, because you decided that she deserves it. You are gift­ing her with your time and what is there that is more pre­cious in this world. Time eas­ily is the one com­mod­ity that can­not be recovered, once it is given or used for a par­tic­u­lar cir­cum­stance it is gone, irre­voc­ably so.  What bet­ter and more pleas­ing is there to any­one than to think “…and he spent it on me…”.

The fact that I bring home a flower is neg­li­gible, sure it looks good and I know my slave likes roses what makes it spe­cial is that I inves­ted time. I would sin­cerely sug­gest that you recon­sider the next time you feel that a man­i­cure or a new hair­cut is an adequate way to guer­don your slave. How much time do you invest in her nails or her hair?

Your prop­er­ties emo­tional well being is the most pre­cious com­mod­ity you have in your rela­tion­ship and by exten­sion that makes her phys­ical form just as import­ant. Clos­ing the loop and return­ing to the state­ment of being nice, I took the liberty of look­ing up the term nice, amongst many other defin­i­tion, this is the one that struck me most:

Exhib­it­ing cour­tesy and polite­ness: a nice ges­ture.

To me it is quite obvi­ous that regard­less of the life­style we choose to make a part of who we are exhib­it­ing cour­tesy and polite­ness should be a part of any rela­tion­ship. I accede that cour­tesy and polite­ness in a M/s rela­tion­ship need to be meas­ured against a dif­fer­ent scale than in a vanilla rela­tion­ship, yet they need to be present and ingrained in the dynamic of the rela­tion­ship for it to truly work.

Sus­tain­ab­il­ity can only be achieved when you replen­ish what you take at an equal or greater rate than it is being depleted. I am not advoc­at­ing for you to be the nicest Mas­ter on the planet nor do I think that every slave needs the same level of cour­tesy and polite­ness. Some might need little to none oth­ers might be more fra­gile and demand such atten­tion in order not to break, but what I urge any­one is to find their equi­lib­rium of niceness.

Treat your prop­erty as the rarest of com­mod­it­ies, with the under­stand that what you take out of her might not be so eas­ily replaced and what you might end up repla­cing it with might turn out to not be pleas­ing at all.