photo credit: alh1
I have returned from a trip. While said trip was too short lived to explain my silence it does give me an oppor­tun­ity to break that silence. My life has felt very “sor­ted” lately and I enjoy that feel­ing of con­tent. I went away over the week­end to see my Grand­mother. She cel­eb­rated her 80^th birth­day and as the only grand­child in the fam­ily I felt it only nat­ural to be there. The joy on her face is hard to put into words and I think I can only relate it to one other person.

I see the same expres­sion on my slave’s face whenever she gets to touch me again after a long time of abstin­ence. Some­thing I prac­tised with her for the last three weeks and finally broke it last night. Not allow­ing my slave to touch my cock is just as much of an exper­i­ment for me as it is a les­son to her. I would stip­u­late that it is a con­tinual les­son of dis­cip­line for me and a con­tinu­ous les­son of not always being allowed to have what she carves for her.

It is import­ant to me that I am reminded of what I have been given. To fall into repet­it­ive routine and no longer appre­ci­ate what you have is the worst thing that can hap­pen to any rela­tion­ship and I believe the same applies to own­ing a slave. Without remov­ing the con­stant pleas­ure I have access to how would I under­stand its true value. Giv­ing me the oppor­tun­ity to exper­i­ence my day without grat­ing myself access to it will not only rekindle my crav­ing but it also reas­sure me that I still want it.

I can rest assured for I want it enough that the neigh­bours feel it neces­sary to send the police to our house when I finally decide to use my slave. Com­ing back from my visit back home I had planned on using my slave that very night. I had a lovely time fuck­ing all her holes and filling her belly with cum. After all there was enough stored because I chose not to touch myself dur­ing my three day absence. I enjoy using my slave as the fuck­toy I trained her to be and I enjoy see­ing how des­per­ate she is when it comes to crav­ing my touch. I want to keep that del­ic­ate bal­ance and unless I can be con­vinced that she has turned into an insa­ti­able fuck­toy which is overly con­fid­ent with her own sexu­al­ity I will con­tinue with my cur­rent course of action.

On a very dif­fer­ent note I would like to add that I am very proud of my slave. She finally got to spend some time alone with pet and that marks a big step for­ward in my book. I am sure she will post some­thing on that topic very soon over on her site. As I men­tioned before it is import­ant to me that my slave can handle pet on her own for those situ­ations where I can­not be present. Hav­ing made the decision to spend some time with pet on her own and handle the beha­viour of pet and her over­all visit in the man­ner she did makes me proud. I can only say that I am most pleased with her pro­gress in the man­ner. This will lead to more intim­acy and a bet­ter under­stand­ing between the two of them. Espe­cially now where I am plan­ning more intric­ate play with the pet. Espe­cially those around full body encase­ment using liquid latex and thoughts on sub­mer­ging her under water, bound and help­less with a diving reg­u­lator to breathe through. I still need to fin­ish  the cage down­stairs so that pet can be kept prop­erly on when she comes and vis­its us. That is planned for this week­end most likely as I have all the meas­ure­ments already and a good idea on how I want to build it.

I am back and I am happy, I am look­ing for­ward to the rest of this month.